Understanding Your Lover •••

Lover is a word highly exquisite and aesthetic in itself. But there exist no single specific meaning of the word. A person who loves someone or who is loved by someone is generally regarded as a lover. However, the word ‘lover’ is not as simple as it sounds. There exist umpteen layers that engulf the depths of the word called ‘lover’. 

Lovers with champagne looking away
Pretty lovers man and woman

There exist different kinds of lovers. Some lovers are sweet & sensible, whereas some are violent & insane. There exist numerous other species and subspecies too. But here I’m going to talk about a grey, albeit, common yet a lesser understood species of lovers. The discussion won’t bore you I can bet unless you hate reading or thinking, for I cannot do anything in that case. (Winks intended)

A Lesser – Understood but Commonly – Found Species of Lovers 

Young lovers holding hands and talking to each other
Young Lovers Holding Hands, talking to each other at cafe

Well, I have known people who love beyond all extremities. For them, their life rotates only round their lover; their mind, body and soul, all long only for their lover; their lover is the full stop of their life; all their ambitions collapse when it comes to their beloved. Such people only love to love and be loved by their lover. Such kind of lovers fall under a highly commonly – found cum lesser – understood type of species of lovers. 

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Such kind of lovers know no beyonds. They even show highly obsessive and irritating behaviour at times. Their behaviour includes doubting their lover unnecessarily (where they oftentimes know it’s completely pointless); wanting to be all – time  close to their lover (which certainly isn’t possible every time); fighting unnecessarily over trivial issues; overreacting over useless points. They many – a – times become as angry as hell; their moods change faster than zephyrs. In one moment, they are wholly drenched in ardour for their lover; in the next moment, they are found sunbaked in the sauce of aggression. Many people can relate to this, I know. (Keep my sympathies.)  

But as there exist two faces of every coin, the same is the case here as well. When such lovers love (free of the burden of their mind), there can’t be any comparison of a lover more passionate than them. Their love knows no bounds and limits. Such lovers are highly unique than the usual kind of lovers. They love forgetting everything, like there’s only one motto of their life, i.e., to love their lover wholeheartedly. 

In addition, such lovers can go to any extent for their lover. Any bloody extent, I highlight (in an attempt to give a clearer picture)! That’s why they are often termed as ‘psycho’ or ‘insane’. But the question arises that are they psycho or insane in real. We generally judge people without ever trying to step into their shoes. 

Here, I want to ask that do one ever tries to find out the root behind such lovers’ extreme possessiveness and insanity? Do one ever tries to do a psychoanalysis of such lovers’ moods and behaviours? Do one ever really tries to understand such lovers’ mentality behind their thoughts and actions? Rarely does anyone! Well, no human does anything merely out of interest. There lie some solid reasons that affect everyone’s mind and making. The same is the case with such kind of lovers. 

We should always think the other way round as well. One should ponder over the thought that there oftentimes exist some obscurities veiled under the garb of madness and irrationality that blur our thinking towards others. To talk about such psycho cum short – tempered cum excessively possessive lovers, it can be said that it might be possible that they stayed all their life starving for love and affection. It might be possible that they never in their life even for a single moment experienced true love, and maybe that’s why after getting it they become highly possessive and crazy too (sometimes). Those who get something after the bitterest of turmoils generally value it far strongly and seriously than the ones who get it quite easily. So, one should never judge anyone without knowing the inner upheavals that torment his/her mind. 

Apart from this, because of such lovers’ moodiness, obsessiveness, possessiveness and childish behaviour, they are often (on a broad level) believed to be untameable and dangerous. Although it is true in most of the cases, the fact is generally only partially understood. Such lovers are untameable and dangerous sometimes (or even oftentimes) only because they love their lover with whole their heart and soul. They cannot see anybody doing any harm to their lover; they fear losing their lover; that’s why they show some uncommon type of possessiveness. Never mind! Well, although such lovers are believed to be dangerous, I can bet that nobody can ever love like them. Nobody means nobody! For them, love is their life and breath; without their lover, they hardly can imagine living a single moment. Their lover is the beginning, middle and end of their life. 

So, I hope from next time onwards (after reading this lil piece on “lover”), you’ll try to understand your lover’s thoughts and actions from an updated cum cool – headed perspective. Hope you have a lovely love life! Good luck ☺ 

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